Dear Jackson,

December 28, 2010

Wait, what happened to 2010?

Filed under: 1 year-old - 2 years-old, Life lessons — aJOHNymous @ 3:40 pm

Another Christmas has come and gone and 2011 is just a few days away. Now that you’re able to walk around, I think you had a much more fun time than last year. Lots of tearing at wrapping paper and lots of playing with boxes and packaging rather than what came inside them. I suppose that’s how it goes, though. Once again, you got absolutely spoiled by everyone. Our house and your mom’s office look like toy stores right about now. Of course, being the geek-Dad that I am, I made sure I got you some Spider-Man and Star Wars stuff so that I can start to prepare you for a childhood of awesome movies and comics. On top of all the toys and books from everyone, you also got a check for $250 from Jake, your Godfather. You owe him quite a heartfelt thank you letter before you start college, so keep that in mind. All in all, it was a pretty good Christmas for everybody and everyone really loved watching you experience it. It truly is like being a kid again.

We got to see your baby sibling for the first time yesterday via an ultrasound. He/she is nothing more than a nickel-sized, wiggling bean-shape, but we could make out some human features such as arms, legs, and the beginnings of a head and spine. We were also able to confirm that there is only one little person growing inside your mom so our fears of a litter were thankfully assuaged. It still doesn’t seem real that by late July or early August we will be parents twice over. I can’t imagine how life is going to change when he/she finally arrives.

I guess I can already confirm that 2011 is going to be a crazy year. 2010 is ending with a lot of unresolved resolutions that I made just about a year ago today. The year started off so well, and I went through a very brief period near the end of the first quarter where everything seemed to be going according to plan, but then I got lazy and stopped working hard. I fell into old habits and old routines. This year I really need to step it up and make these resolutions stick for the entire year and onward. Right now, I feel less healthy, less motivated, and less fulfilled than I ever have before. I hate feeling that way because I don’t want it to rub off on you or affect you in negative ways. I’m going to try something different in 2011. I’m going to start with only one resolution and I’m going to hope that it spider webs off into multiple resolutions as the year goes on and things become a little crazier with the new arrival.

So here is my one resolution to start them all:

I’m going to work out more and eat healthier.

The one thing that I’ve come to realize is that I am not only much healthier when I’m working out and eating clean, but I am also much happier and emotionally stable. I’ve really let myself go these past few months. I’ve ballooned up from 180 to 200 pounds (my heaviest weight ever) and I’ve been eating and drinking like shit. I chalk a lot of it up to stress at work because November and December are particularly stressful months for my job, but most of it is due to sheer laziness on my part. It’s really crazy how what you eat and how active you are can affect your mindset and attitude. If I don’t feel physically healthy, I damn sure don’t feel emotionally healthy and that’s not a good thing. I want to turn this around and I hope that by not overwhelming myself with a long list of resolutions, I will be able to stay motivated and introduce new and positive resolutions throughout the year without missing a beat.

Can you tell that I’ve been reading some self-help books lately? Hey, never be too afraid to get external help when you feel like you can’t do it alone. Never let pride get in the way of living a healthy and happy life. That’s the mistake I’ve been making for far too long now. I like to read true stories about folks who’ve had it way worse than I do but were able to change everything by staying positive and turning things around through sheer work ethic. A healthy body leads to a healthy mind leads to a healthy outlook on life. That’s my new mantra for 2011.

I’m 27 years old and I’m not getting any younger. My back is giving me issues, my energy level is super low, and I get winded walking up the six flights of stairs to my floor at work. Things have got to change. I can’t keep abusing my body and mind like this and expect to feel good about myself. God forbid my UC flares back up unexpectedly and I’m still living a lazy, sedentary lifestyle like I am right now. That could be devastating and emotionally crippling for me. Yeah, it really can get that bad. That’s why I need to get my shit together now and change my life for everyone’s sake, not just my own.

I hope this doesn’t ring hollow because of how much I seem to harp on myself about these same issues over and over again. I know I have a problem and I know how to fix it, all I lack is the motivation to start and the determination to continue.

I’ve heard it said that the journey of a million miles starts with one, single, solitary step. In my case, it’ll start with a meal and/or a workout.

Here’s to 2011, buddy. Life is about to get a whole lot more interesting for all of us…


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